It's 1:00 in the morning on February 15th as I write this. Valentine's day was a little on the intense side. I spent the morning working, the afternoon looking over notes, the evening taking a 100 question exam for my measurement and assessment class, and the night shopping. The last time I took more than about two hours at one time for myself (other than to sleep) was probably the week school started. That's not true, there may have been a time or two, but I almost always feel guilty about pretty much anything I do that isn't necessary. Heck, until I went to the grocery store after church last Sunday, it had been almost three weeks since I had been. I didn't really get much when I went anyway. Basically stuff so that I could make smoothies. And ice cream. When you are studying for a 100 question measurement and assessment exam, not having ice cream is not an option. And I wonder why I'm overweight (I don't really wonder, just an expression). I gave myself permission after the test to do whatever I wanted to. So I did. I went to a shoe store I had a $10 off $10 purchase coupon at. I didn't see any shoes I was in love with (somebody please call CNN), but I found a 2-pack of socks for $10.95. A dollar and some change for two (nice) pairs of socks? I'll take it! After that, I was going to go get some food at Moe's, but there were probably 10 people in in line and Moe's isn't always the fastest ever. I opted for Chick-fil-A instead.
I was standing by the condiment area when one of the workers said he could help me. I started to walk up, and this lady walked up right in front of me to get a refill. She had NO idea I was there. Totally oblivious. I could tell the guy working felt bad, but he was really awkward about it. Somebody else took my order while that drink was getting refilled. Let me just tell you, being alone in a chick-fil-a on Valentine's day is kind of depressing. Not that I need a boyfriend. Not that right now is the right time for one. I guess I let what other people might think about me get to me. Anyway, they apparently ran out of chicken strips and had to cook some more. The manager was so nice and kept apologizing. I kept saying it was fine. It was. I wasn't in a rush (which was beautiful). She gave me a coupon, and told me at least twice how much she appreciated me being so kind about it, which made me feel really good. I hope it restored her faith in humanity that not all customers suck. I'm sure pretty much anybody that has to deal with customers of any sort deals with some people that are, to put it bluntly, assholes.
After that, I went to Target. You cannot have a night out with nothing to do and not make a visit to Target. I didn't really buy anything of significance. Fruit snacks (Target's are the best. You know it's true.) and wrapping paper, to be exact.
I came home and watched The Office and then watched Valentine's Day. Considering how much I hate the actual day of Valentine's Day, I really like that movie.
Maybe intense was the wrong word. Different. I'm not sure when the last time I watched a movie in its entirety in one sitting was.
I guess what I'm trying to get at is that while it feels awkward and uncomfortable for me to be alone on Valentine's Day because of the way I perceive people's perceptions of me, today was mostly different because I actually took time for myself. It was beautiful.
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